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Review: The Equalizer 2

July 20, 2018 1 min read

There’s a scene in Sony’s The Equalizer 2, the follow-up to 2014’s rather enjoyable original, wherein Denzel Washington’s Robert McCall breaks into a drug den, beats the holy hell out a few guys and pushes his way into a room with 8 or so gangster-acting-and-looking dudes. He’s got a pistol in one hand and an Uzi in the other, arms crossed at the wrists to offer full coverage and threat of death to all. One of the toughs says, “Who are you,” and McCall, aka the titular Equalizer and former CIA black-ops agent says, “I’m your daddy, your mama just never told you.” It’s the high point of the film. It’s vintage Equalizer. More importantly, it’s vintage Denzel. I laughed. Everyone in the audience laughed. It was what we’d come to see. Unfortunately, it was nearing an hour into the movie, and it was the only point in the film that made anyone emote at all.

When I say it was the high point, not only do I mean it was the best, I mean things went downhill from there, and fast, before crashing into an indecipherable mess at the bottom, a quagmire of nonsense that has so little logic or written cohesion that I literally shook my head like a man much older than me might when talking about his lawn, those damned kids and how things were in his day. It’s that dumb.

Review: The Equalizer 2 screenshot